So I just woke up from a dream in which I was driving 80ish on the highway, and it was a little foggy. I look in my rearview to see an Ambulance, lights off, right on my bumper. I'm just about to move out of the left lane to let him pass when, through the mist, I see what he's headed for - 3 cars crashed, and rescue workers trying to get the people onto stretchers. I slam the breaks and turn, but they rolled to the left, under my car. I remember feeling the bumps of the bodies. This same scenario happened two more times, before it turned to snow. I wouldn't allow myself to think about whether I killed anyone until I could stop the car and do something about it, but I just kept sliding, and sliding...

I also had tattooed Coors Light logos on the backs of my feet, and a flip flop tattooed onto the top. Sooo glad to wake up and not see those!!

And Jorie called me to hang out, and I left without a shirt. And the stairs were broken. And Dave was pissed that Steve changed 242 from a strip joint to an upscale place.

Not in dream land:

SAM GETS MARRIED IN 2 DAYS WTFFFFF YAYYYYYYY

Thanks for the offer, but no thanks. Just because you're more than willing to cheat on your girlfriends with me does NOT mean I'm interested in the same.

Alright, so the month of oddities that was June is finally over, and it's been a lifetime since I posted a life-status update. Though I don't think I'm going to do that now, here's some highlights for my time capsule of self.

~ Not working in the field I spent tens of thousands of dollars to learn is aggrivating, especially since the one I'm experienced in is miserable. I did, for what it's worth, get "promoted" to "supervisor" at "work," which is assanine because with or without a new chef and manager, it's still a crap show. I've been there less than 3 months and AM the senority - I know it's the restaurant industry, but seriously? The turn over is insane, especially for such a small place. Put it this way - on a busy night, we have 7 FOH people scheduled (5 servers, a bartender, a host). In almost 3 months, I've seen 14 people leave. There aren't that many on the staff at a given time. And the owner doesn't see a common denominator...

~ Dennis is awesome. Last night we made Steak Diane (with grilled asparagus and potato/corn/cheese hash), popped a bottl'a wine and had dinner in the backyard. It was pretty sweet. It's tough working opposite schedules, though to be fair I have had the last 3 nights off. After dinner we finally went to see the Hangover, which was funny. It could have been funnier if it hadn't been for facebook, showing me that everyone thought it was the best thing ever. I will hand it to them though, they didn't spoil all the funniest parts in the previews like so many do - re: Bruno...

~ I have the Sorrentino/Hache wedding, and my role in it, on my resume, and I say why not? I've literally done more work for this shindig that's in my field than I had through my entire Clear Channel internship, and it's more relevant work too. Designing invitations, crisis management, event planning and team management. One month, 21 days to go!

~ I still have yet to pay off my CCRI debt, and therefore actually have my BS from EC. Maybe if I ever get that unemployment...

~ I'm supposed to be helping my friend Amanda move her stuff from south of the Hill to storage. You can tell it was the plan by the thunder at 7am, and the downpour that persists. Oh New England. If nothing else, maybe I'll get a decent breakfast out of it.

~ Acrylic nails keep me from biting my own.

~ I just watched the 4:20 episode of Family Guy last night, and Quagmire reminds me of me with my cat. I'm rediculous. Whatever.

~ Riding in a Jeep without doors? Fun, especially in the sunshine. Riding in a Jeep without doors at night, when you can't figure out how to turn off the interior lights without putting the doors back on? Weird.

~ Saw Aerosmith with the Dropkick Murphy's on June 16th, and a few days later No Doubt with Paramore. It was awesomeeeee.

~ Sam's Bridal Shower was great, Dennis now has fantasies of starting a catering company. I hope he can do what he loves, and love doing it.

~ This summer, my only plan is that wedding. I hope Dennis and I get our Sunday Fundays back, though we do feel like we might have done everything RI has to offer. If we were to move, we'd want to stay pretty close to the coast, I'd want to get away from bastard snow, but stay away from hurricanes. Is the west coast truly the best coast?

Whatev, something to ponder later. Right now, I'm going to get me some amazing breakfast with a pretty lady in Providence. Maybe, just maybe, I'll tell you how it was. Maybe I'll post again before December. It's a mystery.

I'm soooooo out of practice blogging, way too used to status updates.

So I've been "courting" a prospective employeer for 2, possibly 3 months now. We've been emailing back and forth, he's given me so much positive feedback and we've had several tentative times to meet that have fallen through due to his busy schedule. Just last week, he asked me to text him and gave me his cell number so we could communicate more easily. I sent him a text yesterday afternoon, just saying hello and asking how his vacation week was. Hours later, he replied that he was doing well, but still quite busy. My reply this morning was to ask whether he thought there might be time to meet tomorrow, or next week when he was back in the office. He replies with "I'm away into next week."

The deal the entire time has been that the he/company needs help, and that I seem to be not only capable but a good fit for the culture.

So what should I think about the fact that I just saw them hiring [EDIT - FOR 5 POSITIONS] on Craigslist?

Is this a not-so-polite brush off, or an indication that I should apply through traditional means (rather than the facebook-connection I used)?  And if I do show initiative by applying online, will it look as though I'm going behind his back? How patient and understanding am I supposed to be, and why isn't there a tactful way to ask whether I'm wasting his time and mine?

I am very interested in this company and want to work with them very much, but Emerson didn't teach us what to do in this sort of situation.

Any feelings?

My least favorite chore ever is doing the dishes. I usually do it around 5 or so, after a long day of staring at the computer and thinking of new ways to find a job. I just realized that it's become the highlight of my day.

And yesterday, Dennis told me I'm twice the slob he is.

Fuck my life.

This is so hopeless. I'm so lost. I really don't know what to do or where to look anymore - there's nothing out there! And instead of getting emails or phonecalls from employment prospects, or responses to the great cover letters and resumes I put out multiple times a day, I get calls from my credit card company, asking when I can pay my bill. I tell them, every 3 days, that I'm unemployeed. No, I don't know when I'll be getting a job. Do you pay attention to anything about life? No, I don't have *just* $87. Yes, I understand that's not a lot of money for you, you make money. I have $2 in my wallet and almost that much in my bank account. Somehow, I'm supposed to live off this and still wear clean clothes to ANOTHER interview, which will require gas in my car and that I not starve to death between now and then. And then, if they decide to even dignify my efforts and our meeting with anything, I will be thrilled, because it will be the first time in OVER THREE MONTHS that someone will. And even if I do get a job tomorrow, odds are I still won't get my first paycheck from that job until mid-March. So really, you're going to waste my time and yours by calling me back to check on the progress on Monday? I fucking hate my life right now, and it's so exhausting putting on the friendly, positive face. I'm answering my phone politely and professionally every single time these collection companies call, repeating myself politely when no one responds. There are three types of calls I get now, all from numbers listed as "unavailable" or "restricted." They either want me to wait for an important message (one of the scam job postings I replied to trying to sell me something), want me to pay a bill that I can't pay, or just wait 6 seconds before hanging up on me. I CAN HEAR MONTEL IN THE BACKGROUND - I KNOW YOU'RE THERE.

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I find answering surveys to be a more fulfilling form of entertainment while waiting for returned calls than sitting and watching the cat.


1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
"distribution."
From a less dull book (BEATLES complete easy guitar), equally far away, the words are "love her. A love like" I don't really think you're interested in me reading the music to you, so I won't. Especially since LJ is dead.

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
Hah, the Beatles book I just put down. And a pillow on the couch.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
"Sex With Mom and Dad," which is nothing like one of the last entries posted to SuperbHeroGirl's LJ. It's nice not having cable.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
4:40?

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
4:38. hah.

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
An airplane in the distance, does iTunes count? Jason Mraz is on haha.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
I got home around 2:30 this morning, and I had been at the Sherba homestead. So lovely to see them!

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Leah's old LJ.

9. What are you wearing?
Jeans, flip flops - yes I know it's February, but I also have the screen door open! I wish it was summer already! -, a thermal shirt, a green shirt that belongs to Jess, an earring, a thumb ring, the necklace Sam got me, nailpolish on my toes, a white bra, blue underpants. Probably a bandaid too.

10. Did you dream last night?
Yes, it was a sad one.

11. When did you last laugh?
When these people came over to look at my apartment, some joke was made and it resulted in my socially stimulated reaction to emit funny noises.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
A few different drawings I did, a picture Doug took of me, a couple pictures Dennis took/made, 24 albums, two other paintings, a touch of sunlight and a coupla electrical outlets.

13. Seen anything weird lately?
Nothing comes to mind right away, I'm sure I have though.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
It's the best one I've taken all day!

15. What is the last film you saw?
41.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Pay off debts for my friends and family and self. Then I'd probably throw a big party and invite everyone I knew. That big inflatable waterslide would definitely be there.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:
I was excited about wearing flipflops earlier, now my toes are cold.
Also, even though I'm decent at keeping in touch with people, I wish I were a lot better at it.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I'd make personal success a result of how good a person you are, as opposed to how well you can screw people over.

19. Do you like to dance?
I used to, I don't really anymore.

20. George Bush:
Is not my problem anymore!

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
My daughter.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
I'd need an adult to make this decision.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
I'd love to, especially if I knew other languages and while I have nothing tieing(tying? tiing?) me down to where I am.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
In a distinct feminine monotone, "Your destination is approaching - straight ahead - in - 500. feet."

25. 4 people who must also do this in THEIR journal:
No one will, LJ is dead, son.

I took my parents out for my Dad's bday, and it was excellent. We started at Newport Vineyards, did a little tour and tasting ($9/person!) and Dennis met up with us. After that, we went to The Mooring for dinner, and finished the day off with a sunset cruise on a sail boat. Those were expensive, but it was overall worth it.

I need to get better at updating my journal, especially since I haven't even written about vacation yet, or any of the other great Sundays of the summer. Someday... probably in the winter when I get lazy again.

As a way to chronicle this summer, I have decided to use my much neglected LJ. Dennis and I have had a lot of awesome Sundays, and here's a list of what we did.

7/27 - We went to Block Island to see Gov't Mule. Even though we woke up wayyyy early we still were having fun by the ferry ride, during which we discovered the weather on the mainland is not the weather on BI. It was crappy and rainy until about  5 miles out, when the sun came out. Once on the island, we got tasty breakfast, D new sunglasses, and went to Bolangers (?). There we met Mike and Patty, who had just got engaged. Then we played in the waves and laid in the sun. We went up to the show which we didn't have tickets for early, and bumped into a guy who sold us his extra tickets for $20 each, instead of the $32 they were asking (SCORE #1). We got a coupla Del's drinks, mind had Bacardi Grand Melon (amazing!) his had Absolut Ruby Red (not for me). We thought Gov't Mule went on and were shocked at how young and modern they and their music was... it turned out to be a band Dennis had loved in Colorado called Rosehill Drive (check 'em out). Dennis's friend Tom was there and he's such an ego boost - a genuinely awesome person. Gov't Mule came on and dark clouds began to roll in from the North East, bringing distant beautiful lightning. Suddenly a second front began to roll in from the North West, creating crazy clouds I've never seen before. We decided to pack up and go under the onning, and not a second too soon as rain started pelting down. 

I have crap to do, I'll finish this later.

 Every now and then I have dreams that involve Joe in a way - in some way I'm going to get on an airplane, but I either have all sorts of trouble in the terminal or the sky has something wrong with it, or a building gets in the way... it's weird, especially since I don't have a fear of flying, more the incredible ability to barely make flights because I oversleep.
Last night was another, except it started in Boston. I was going to a new floor at Emerson and took the elevator. This elevator ascended more than 100 stories, for some of which we went sideways. I did whatev I needed to do and went back down, looking around my disgusting city which I couldn't call home - mostly because I didn't live there, but it's where I was. 
So then I'm in the bathroom and I see a woman rip a cloth and wipe her face with it - that yellow cloth was my t-shirt. I started flipping out on her at Gracies, all the best lines I'd never be able to say, and it turned out I was on Candid Camera. The guy with the camera told me I had some new Erskines to meet, meaning from my father's side (I don't know any of them). So I went, and there was this long line at Thelma's, Joe's wife's, parent's house that I had to wait in to meet my family. While I was waiting in line, I kept looking up at the sky, in which there was a black hole at the edge of the atmosphere and I was watching a plane get sucked into it.

Then The Cheat licked my face and here we are.

Why do I have so many weird dreams lately?